Traveling with a companion can be a wonderful experience, but it can also be a test of compatibility. When you and your travel partner have similar travel styles, the trip is more likely to go smoothly, bringing you closer together and deepening your bond. However, when your travel styles are different, it can lead to tension and conflicts that can strain your relationship. So how do you know if your travel styles are aligned or not? We asked travel experts to share some telltale signs of incompatibility and offer advice on how to handle it.
1. One of you is a planner and the other is more spontaneous.
If one person loves having a well-thought-out plan while the other prefers to fly by the seat of their pants, it can lead to resentment and conflict. “If you are someone who likes to have a flexible itinerary and be open to spontaneous changes in plans, while your travel companion prefers a more structured and organized approach, it can lead to resentment and conflict,” says travel blogger Sean Lau of The Turkey Traveler. “You may feel restricted and constrained by their need for a rigid schedule, while they may feel stressed and anxious in an environment that lacks clear plans and direction.”
2. One of you is an early riser and the other likes to sleep in.
Having conflicting sleep schedules can create friction when traveling together. The morning person may get up early, eager to get a head start on the day, while the night owl may want to skip morning activities to log some extra sleep. “For instance, if you want to get up early and walk around the city but your companion is hungover from the night before, that could be a problem and a sign of incompatibility,” says travel content creator Jen Ruiz, author of “12 Trips In 12 Months.” Similarly, having different energy levels can make it difficult to find a pace for the trip that suits both people. “If one person wants to do a lot of activities while the other prefers a more relaxed pace, this can lead to disagreements and arguments,” adds Lau.
3. One of you is an adventure-seeker and the other prefers a leisurely trip.
When choosing a travel companion, it’s important to consider what you each enjoy doing on a trip. Some people want to pack their days with lots of action and new experiences, while others may be looking for more leisurely activities. “Are you an outdoorsy hiker who wants to get out into nature while your travel buddy wants to explore museums? Would you want to shop and sightsee until you drop, while the other person just wants to relax at the spa or by the pool?” says travel content creator Sam Cormier, the woman behind the @samanthas_suitcase Instagram account. “This will likely cause tension on what should be a fun vacation because neither of you are doing what you want to do.”
Having different levels of comfort when it comes to physical activity and nature can also make it more difficult to find mutually enjoyable activities, says Lau.
4. One of you is a big spender and the other is a saver.
Money can be a major source of conflict when traveling. Issues tend to arise when one person is looking to splurge and have a more luxurious experience while the other person is looking to save a few bucks wherever possible. “If you want to go to a high-end restaurant and stay in posh hotels while your travel partner wants to microwave something from a local gas station and stay in long-term rentals, one of you is going to be uncomfortable,” says Ruiz. “Make sure your values around money are similar and that you’re prepared to have a budget and spending range that’s aligned with each other. Otherwise, one person feels stretched and worried about money, and the other can feel restrained in their ability to enjoy the destination how they’d like.”
What To Do When Your Travel Styles Don’t Align
The key to having a successful trip with a companion whose travel style differs from yours is open communication and a willingness to compromise. “Planning the trip together so that you both have a say in activities, restaurants, and accommodations is key in making sure both sides are heard,” says Cormier.
If you know (or suspect) that you and your travel partner have different vacation styles, Ruiz suggests booking separate accommodations when possible. “That way, everyone can retreat to their own space at the end of the day to let tensions defuse,” she says. “I have rented
