We’ve all been there – a rough day, a painful argument, or just feeling overwhelmed by life. Sometimes, all we want is a good cry. And while there are plenty of places to let our emotions out, one location seems to be a favorite among many – the car.
As someone who has spent years navigating the dating scene in a major city, I have developed a personal list of the best places to cry in London. But my absolute favorite? The tree-covered perch above an Islington bridge on the Regent’s canal. It’s the perfect spot for a private and dramatic sob session.
But why do so many of us turn to our cars for a good cry? To answer this question, I spoke to Dr. Jordan Conrad, a psychotherapist and the founder and clinical director of Lexington Park Psychotherapy. Here’s what he had to say.
Privacy and comfort
According to Dr. Conrad, the simple logistics of privacy play a big role in why we turn to our cars to cry. In today’s world, we are constantly expected to be “on” – presentable and put together. But in our cars, we have a sense of privacy and familiarity. It’s like a home away from home, where we can let our guard down and be ourselves.
Not only that, but we are literally locked away from the outside world. No one can enter without our permission, making it a safe and secure space to let our emotions out. Dr. Conrad explains, “It feels okay to cry, to scream, to be angry, to be a mess.”
A space for processing
Our cars also provide us with a physical space to process our emotions. Dr. Conrad points out that the moment we close the car door and sit down, there is a brief moment before we start the engine where we are alone and separated from the outside world. This can give us the emotional space we need to actually feel and process whatever has happened outside.
It’s important to note that there is no “normal” amount of crying, and it’s healthy to let our emotions out. However, if you find yourself feeling low most of the time for two weeks or longer, it may be a good idea to seek help from a professional. This is especially true if your emotions are affecting your work or relationships and getting worse.
Help and support
If you are struggling with your emotions, there are many resources available for support. Mind offers a listening service from Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393. Samaritans also offers a 24-hour listening service on 116 123 (UK and ROI – this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill). CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offers a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, as well as a webchat service.
For those under 25, The Mix is a free support service that can be reached at 0808 808 4994 or [email protected]. Rethink Mental Illness also offers practical help through its advice line at 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm) and at rethink.org.
Remember, it’s okay to cry and let your emotions out. And if you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, know that there is help and support available. So go ahead and have that good cry in the comfort of your car – just make sure to stay safe on the road.
